DREADED DEISRES - CHAPTER 21&22
Sniffing sounds is the only thing coming out of Amelia’s mouth as she stayed still, her forehead pressing against Byron’s as he continued to dip his long lean fingers into her hair, tugging on her scalp as she continues to breathe
That’s all she needs right now, a soft breathing space to relax her mind
The complete silence adding to her peace as she finally opened her eyes, meeting with Byron’s cold gaze
He’s still indifferent no matter what, no single trace of human expression but still he managed to calm her down, something that no one has ever done before, not even her Dad or Aunt Milicent
The last time Aunt Milicent tried calming her down she ended up badly injured, how did it happen?, She didn’t know….. just screams and scratches and blood, so much fùcking blóod
Her episode started turning violent when she clocked fourteen, she was just coming back from school when her Aunt wore a red dress and she lost it, shaking and biting her fingers
She remembered how Aunt Milicent flinched as she stepped closer to her that day and suddenly she slashed her face with her long fingers, scratching and kicking her Aunt repeatedly till she almost passed out but luckily her Dad intervained and knocked her out cold
Amelia winced at the remembrance of the thoughts and Byron released her just to look at her face
“I told you to stop thinking” he retorted and she sighs, her eyes mourning at the loss of his warmth
“I’m trying, it’s just that nobody has ever been able to calm me down ever since I clocked fourteen and that’s why they suggested the drugs, I’m a monster Byron, you shouldn’t be close to me” she said, leaning back on her seat as she wipes her eyes
Her face is so red right now and Byron couldn’t stop staring
“A monster?, I guess that makes it two of us then” he replied her comment on herself and she chuckles
“I’m being serious, Byron, what if next time I actually lose it for real and you are not able to stop me?” She asked and he hummed, drumming the steering wheel
“You won’t hurt me, just as I won’t hurt you, believe me wild one, the only way to fight these demons is by avoiding them” he said and she nods
“My past……I should avoid it” she mutters and he sighed, noticing the sad pout on her face
“Here, come seat on my lap” he gestured, bucking the his seat as it moved backwards a little, creating some space between him and the wheel
Without thinking twice, she reached out to him and he lifts her up like a leather, strandling her weight on himself
“You are being extra nice today, am I going to pay for it?” She whispered, laying her head on his chest as his hands wrapped her up possessively
“With órgasms?, Yes….” He pointed out plainly and she laughed, she can literally feel his heart beats mixing with her’s
“Pervert…..” She trails as she closed her eyes
“More reason why you can’t resist me” he chuckled against her and she raised her eyebrows
“False!, I’m definitely not attracted to you” she pointed out and he pinched her thigh earning a yelp from her
“You are way too sharp mouthed for your own good” he mutters as she raised her head and their faces are just inches apart from each other, her whole body resting on him, he’s way too big and you’d barely notice if she’s on top
“Thank you….” She whispered and he raised his hand to her face, caressing her cheeks before dropping it to her lips, poking on it with his index finger
“You don’t need to thank me” he said, his other hand on her waist, drawing circles on her side as it sent tingling sensation down to her spine
“Don’t be Ç0çƙy and accept it, for once just act human” she protested and he nibbled his hand on the corner of her buttom lip……not minding the fact that she’s talking and it occasionally brushes the inside of her mouth…. it’s a warm feeling and he likes it
He just likes it, you can stop smiling now….. thank you very much
“This is my most human form, Wild one, and right now, it’s longing for this…..” He said, pulling on her buttom lip and she pokes his forehead
“Why are you changing the subject?” She asked, a feeling of excitement running through her even though she tried to ignore it
He paused his hand movement and leaned closer….. just to close the remaining fùcking space between them, he’s been craving for this for a very long time but something is holding him back…….
Her eyes darted over his face in anticipation, watching his face morph from longing to retreating?……he paused just an inch away and kissed her chin instead, disappointment filling her veins as he leaned back into the seat and pulled her on his chest
She swallows hard, what was she expecting anyway?
Silence lingers….. Just breathing and feeling of heartbeats
“I started running today, for the first time in a while and I actually felt alive” she said, hugging herself into his arms, inhaling his sweet minty scent
“You did?, You know too much stress isn’t good for your health” he sounded worried than intended and she noticed it
Why is he hiding the flipping fact that he cares about her?…… pûnk!
“I know, Dad….” She sassed and he rolled his eyes ” but I will be fine, I promise and if I notice anything off, I will let you know” she assured and that kinda took him unawares
He wasn’t expecting her to like… you know, trust him with her burdens, even though he’s a fúcked up human being who doesn’t know how to express or show feelings
“Why are you scrunching your face like that?” She asked with a funny face and he pulled her head into his arms, his voice dropping low as she felt his hot breathe on her ears
“I’m really jealous of your heart right now because it’s póunding inside of you….. and I’m not” the words met Amelia’s ears and she cringed, willing her body not to react as indeed their heartbeats are syncing
“Fùcking perv….” She mutters and a light knock landed on her head, making her wince in pain as she started poking his chest
★
Splashing of water could be heard as Kimberly continues cleaning her face, she looks up and shakes her head, bending down again as she opened up the tap and more water came running
In the process most of her hair is soaked but she didn’t stop, it’s as if she’s trying to peel her face off with the water, she turned off the running tap and rested both hands on each side of the basin thingy, breathing heavily as she lowered her head
She dared not look at the mirror
After leaving her project manager’s office, she hasn’t been herself
“What’s going on miss Kim?, This is so unlike you, I thought it began when you started changing in appearance but changing in your academic too?….. I’m shocked”
The words hit her brain and she breaths heavily, more words ringing in her head
“Should I be disappointed?, I’m looking at what I gave you flipping three months to work on and all I feel right now is the urge to burn it!, You think I’m going to accept this!?”
Another word rings in her head again and she grips the counter harder
“This is your last year in college and unless you are willing to repeat this year all over again?, Get yourself together, I’m being way too nice, don’t come to my office with such nonsense reports or else?…… get out of my office now!!”
A soft whimper left Kim’s lips as she slowly looks up
Looking at her reflection right now all she sees is a broken sad little girl who’s trying so hard to fit into the world
Going several miles just to be it, but in the process she’s losing her true potential, she’s faltering, she’s….. fake
She shakes her head, stretching her hands on the hanger to get a towel when someone handed it over to her, mindlessly not paying attention as she took it and wiped her face before realizing
Her eyes almost popped out of it’s socket as Xander leans on the door, his back pressing against it
“W-what are you doing here?, This is the ladies room, you shouldn’t be here” she stuttered and he raised his eyebrows
“And you also shouldn’t be crying here but I guess we always do the opposite of things, right?” He pointed out and she looks back at the mirror, wiping her face
“Are you stalking me?, If you don’t stop then I might just file for a restraining order” she voiced out and he chuckled
“And is that supposed to be a thr_@t?, Should I be shaking on my butt or what?, Maybe I should start crying because the almighty Kimberly wants to place me on restrain” he cooed and her grip on the towel tightened
“What’s your deal with me?” She asked, tossing the towel to it’s original position
“Have you been cutting your wrist again?” He $h00ts back, pushing his weight off the door
“N-no…”
“You stuttered, which means you are lying” he pointed out as he’s now standing right in front of her
His brows flattened as he shoved her front back to the mirror and she’s staring at their reflection, he leaned forward, placing both hands on the edges, trapping her in the middle between him and the counter, her hands clamped together in fear
“Look into the mirror and lie to your face again, have you been using the blade on your skin?” He asked again and she couldn’t respond, her lips gummed together as guilt took it’s hilts over her
“I knew it, you stubborn brat, one day you are going to cut your veins accidentally and bleed to death, maybe then you will finally learn your lesson” the harsh words clutched onto the pit of her mouth as she just stared at their reflection
“I can’t stop myself….” She trails and he chuckled, which made her look at him
“Oh you will, and I’m going to help you” he said and she furrows her eyebrows in confusion, she tried saying something but a soft peck landed on her lips and she paused for a minute
She just blinks repeatedly like a zombie as he made her face him completely, grabbing her slitted wrist and rolled up her jacket…….
“What are you….. doing?” She asked with a shaky voice and a sinister glint formed on his face
“You think cutting your wrist is fun and it helps you get off your high, right?….. let’s see just how much fun it’s going to be when I’m the one doing the cutting…” He said with a smirk and she gasped, trying to pull her hands away but he slapped her other hand
“Xander…. please, don’t…. I’m going to stop, I promise” she pleaded as he brought out a sharp blade, it’s brand new and her green eyes charged in awe as he pushed her against the counter, zaps of pains washing through her back
“You freaking promised the last hundred times, I’m done listening to your pleas, maybe if I’m the one doing the cutting, your weird urge will go away” he voiced out and she shakes her head as he brought the blade closer to the previous slit on her wrist, it has barely healed as the surface is red
“I’m going to stop…..” She tried pushing him away but she’s trapped
“Move your other hand and I will slice it off” he warned as he sensed her next movement and she bites her lips, the blade getting closer
“Xander….. please, I won’t do it anymore, just stop” the words died down as she felt the sharp blade on her skin…. pressing lightly on it as she sucked in her breath
“Sushh, this is definitely going to hurt” he whispered and her eyes nearly popped out of it’s socket
★
Amelia eyes flutter open as she layed still, wait a minute?, Did she actually fall asleep on Byron’s body?
She raised her head and immediately her eyes met with his cold ones, he’s staring at her…. like he wants to read her soul or something
“What are you doing?….why are you staring at me like that?” Her sleepy hollow voice made him wipe the drool from the corner of her mouth
It’s kinda cute how she slept, soft snores and the way her body felt against his is something he would cross several mountains to feel over and over again
“You fell asleep while we were talking, and I must say you are quite a drooler” he teased and she felt her cheeks heated up in embarrassment
“Will you shut it?, I’m not a drooler, pûnk” she defended and he wipes the other side of her mouth, proving his point as she hides her face in the crook of his neck
They’ve been in the car for hours now, not minding the classes they’ve missed, it’s project week anyway so classes are meant for working on them, Byron couldn’t give two fûcks about any of that
“Don’t you have your project to work on?” His voice vibrated against her chest and she heaved
“You are right, I should go to, this means alot to me since it’s the last year anyway” she said and he lets go of her reluctantly, even though he didn’t want to but he just had to
She flops on the passenger seat, grabbing her bag from the back seat before looking at him, she almost startled as her eyes met his again….. she’s not used to someone watching her every move
“I’m going, you should work on your project too” she said and he leaned into his seat
“Since we on the same department, why don’t you help me?” He coaked mockingly and she rolled her eyes
“Not a chance, I have a lot to do” she said, opening the door and stepping out, she leaned through the wind screen
“Thanks for everything, Byron” she appreciated but he waves her off
“Don’t thank me for something I’m ought to do, just run along now” he cooed and she smiles, rounding the car as she walked away
He pokes his head out the window, watching her every steps as she occasionally waves at some students while stopping to talk to some of them, a small smile graced his lips as he watched her interact with other people
She’s so innocent to be passing through such traumas, or being defective, it’s really hard on her, and she tries so hard to be normal for the world to see, but he knows that she knows deep down she’s slowly losing it, she can’t keep up with the pretence, the drugs aren’t as potent as they were before and she’s slowly drifting away….. it’s only a matter of time before he loses her completely
Schizophrenia……. an illness that took over her family, an illness that ruined her childhood
If her Mother couldn’t handle it then how would she be able to do it?, it’d break her before she even starts
He felt something in his heart squeezed at the thought of Amelia ending up just like her Mother, she’s nothing like her, Amelia can never turn out to be a monster, he would do everything within his power to stop it!
He lets out a long breath, staring at nothing in particular
★
Immediately Amelia arrived at her room, she dropped her bag and hurriedly pulled out her her phone, she needs to talk to her Dad right now, what if?…. Just what if it’s true?, Just what if she ends up like…….
no…no freaking way
The phone continued ringing but he’s not picking up, she yanks her hairpin, flinging it across the room as her hair falls down freely
Byron was able to calm her down today, what if she loses it in front of someone else, it’s risky being around people if she ends up hurting them, what if the life she had shredded off in highschool comes knocking on her door again, how would she fight it?
She tossed her phone on her bed angrily and just like the little girl who got disappointed that her father bailed on her, she’s also feeling exactly that same thing, her Dad is a busy man and doesn’t really have much time to spare, more reason why things ended up this way
A knock on her door made her jolted backwards, wiping her tears as she opened the door and met Roxy standing right there, her blue netty crop top and huge baggy jean that could fit two people, her purple hair falling all the way to her back as she stared at Amelia, Roxy’s fashion sense is incredible
“Are you okay?” Roxy’s voice brings Amelia out of her thoughts and Amelia blinks repeatedly
“Yes…..I am” Amelia responded and Roxy touched Amelia’s hair, it’s so long that it’s hard to resist
“Wow, your hair, I’d never thought I would see it untied, it’s beautiful” Roxy grined, admiring Amelia’s hair and Amelia rolled her eyes playfully, walking into her room and starts searching for her pin
“Have you seen Kimberly?” Amelia asked and Roxy shrugged her shoulders
“She and Mia were together but then I saw Ronna bothering Mia, maybe she’s in class, I don’t know” Roxy stepped into the room, looking at how Amelia had successfully customized everything to her pink taste
It’s annoyingly beautiful
“Let’s go to look for her then….” Amelia gestured and Roxy grabbed her hands, swinging them through and fro as they left
“I need to eat after that” Roxy grined mischievously and Amelia shakes her head, soon only their laughters could be heard
★
★Conference Room★
“Business is business, Mr Steel, and I must say I’m very disappointed in what your son is doing” Rico, Silver’s Dad motioned as both men sat in the huge glassy room
You can smell the aura goshing in the air as both men of power shared a long stare at each other
Mr Steel, owner and founder of the Steel cooperation, his influence and asset management owing one third of the city, he’s a business tycoon, doesn’t do anything illegal as he believes hard work is what you need to get higher, hard work with a touch of mischief
Don’t let his good looks fool you, Steel is exactly what his name interjects, he’s super smart and cunning, a snake in a human body, and also a broken man who’s struggling to keep up with the ways of the business
“You are not as disappointed as I am, Ric” Steel chimed in and Rico furrowed his eyebrows
Rico Queens, a die hard business tycoon who took over his mother’s huge mafia business, and named her after his first name, although he did transformed his mother dirty business into something legal but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s also an unhinged motherfûcker who wipes anyone or anything that tries to come into his way
“He’s your son, of course you should be more disappointed, and for the fact that he’s been roaming over some peasant right in front of my daughter” Rico pointed out as he twirled his pen in-between in his index and fore finger, his calculative eyes roaming over Steel
“The thing is, she’s not just some peasant, Ric….. She’s Earhart Cole’s daughter” Steel voiced out and the expression on Rico’s face is completely out of the world, his jaw tightened up as unpleasant memories started coming back
“Cole’s daughter?, I thought she died” Ric questioned, his confusion becoming evident
“Well, she didn’t, and know she’s back to ruin my son just like her Mother did” Steel sounded very angry
“Your son seems to have forgotten about the deal, he’s already engaged to Silver, and you know the complications of him trying to back out now” Ric pointed out and Steel nods
“You don’t have to worry, they won’t last, poor Amelia is just as broken as her late Mother, soon he would have to give up on her” Steel said with a confident smrik
“And?…….” Rico trailed, leaning forward
Steel looks at Rico and touched his wedding band, flickering it with his fingers
“And I will end her life, parmanently”
The cold sinister glint in the eyes of both men could light up a whole city
★
Amelia and Roxy stepped out of the dorm hand in hand as Roxy kept on talking
“So apparently, Mia and Ronna have something going on, I also think Xander is hiding something with Kimberly, those two creep me out sometime, and Kayden?……I think he’s into Maya” Roxy pursed her lips after the last part of her sentence
“I don’t think so, maybe Kayden is into you” Amelia wagged her eyebrows and Roxy let’s out a long mocking laughter before glaring at Amelia
“That’s absurd, Kayden doesn’t even look at me and hell no would I want to have anything to do with someone like him, he’s weird” she pinched the bridge of her mouth, pulling on it as her mind wandered off
“Instead of talking about boys and who they like, don’t you think we should be more worried about our projects?, I need to prove to my Dad that I’m fit to be in the business world” Amelia bites her lips, thinking about everything that’s been going on for a while now and how distracted she is
“Okay, as from tomorrow, we should start working really hard and also reading, I already have an inheritance to claim but I just need to pass college with ease or else my parents would freak out and disown me” Roxy grined and Amelia laughed
Amelia almost groaned loudly as she remembered that she forgot to take her phone along with her
“My phone, goddamnit” Amelia whined and Roxy stopped moving
“Wait here, imma go get it for you” and with that, Roxy turned around and started walking back to the dorm
Amelia sighs as she kicks her feet in the air playfully, counting the grasses and just doing random stuff while she waits for Roxy
A small smile tugged her eyebrows as her mind drifted off to the fact that she actually fell asleep on Byron’s body, even though she was in a car and it was kinda uncomfortable, she still felt at peace and slept like a baby
Is Byron just pretending to be nice, no…… he still had that poker face on even when she completely broke down in front of him
She winced at the thought of Byron seeing her like that, he shouldn’t have, she doesn’t want anyone to see just how dangerous she tends to be once those moments strikes, it’s hard to control
She sighs, pushing her thoughts away as a familiar voice calls out from behind her, she immediately recognized the voice as a smile plastered on her face
She turned around, and slowly her smile vanished, it’s immediately replaced with confusion, worries and….. more confusion, she didn’t know when her legs started moving as she got to him, her eyes roaming over his body
He looks battered, she could spot the small injuries on his face
“Elzar?, What happened to you?” She asked as she couldn’t believe the cast on his left hand, his head is also bandaged, few healing bruises as she touched his face and he winced a little
“I….I was attacked” the words left his mouth and her mouth falls open, staring at his face and his hand, attacked?, When?, where?, how did it happened?
“What?”
TBC