(The Heart In Between)
By; Sommy Pearl F.
EPISODE 4: SELF HARM
★ ★ ★
Jordan and Nadine could be seen sitting like little lost kids on the bench. He had his fists on his thigh while Nadine kept sniffing.
Jordan still found it strange. The fact that the girl whom he had always harbored a crush on was a lesbian, and she loved some other girl who liked him. It gave him this weird feeling and cold chills.
“You okay now?” He asked and turned to her.
“Yeah” She whispered with a small smile.
“About that. I’m sorry. I never thought you had feeli-
“Why apologize? You never knew” She smiled.
“Yeah” Jordan nodded.
Nadine got up and faced down. “It’s getting late, so I’m going to leave”
“Yeah, sure” He nodded.
“Can you… keep this a secret from everyone. I can trust you, right?”
“Yeah. sure thing”
“Thanks” She smiled.
“And what about your parents? Will you tell them you’re gay?” He asked slowly. The word ‘gay’ was hard to utter for him.
“I…I will. I can’t hide it from them forever” She shrugged.
“I’ll be rooting for you. Tell me the results later”
“I will. Thanks again, Jordan”
“What are friends for”
Nadine giggled and waved to him. He also waved back and watched her leave sight. When she did, he exhaled deeply.
“Okay? That was low key heartbreaking” He scoffed pathetically.
Nadine kept stealing glances at her parents, who chewed on the appetizing salad. She was looking for the right moment to tell them. She had to tell them.
She took the filled glass of water and chugged it down her throat. When she was done, she took a breath and proceeded to opening her mouth. That was the moment her mother talked.
“You two won’t believe it” Mrs. West shook her head.
“Talk about it, darling. I thought the silence would choke me” Her husband chuckled.
Nadine closed her mouth and continued eating. She guessed she had to wait until her mother was done.
“You know the director who I am working with?” Mrs. West and her husband nodded.
Mrs. West is a film scriptwriter. She organizes and writes scripts for films and series. She has notable works, and she’s also well known.
She’s known best for one of her £řøťic films titled; Poisoned Apple. The film received numerous nominations and won awards. It was indeed critically acclaimed.
The film was an exciting and thrilling one. It also contained a lot of explicit scenes. If one would count, The male and female lead had about 12 sèx scenes.
Her mother has written about 12 scripts for movies, and 9 were £řøťic. The only series which she wrote was also £řøťic. Titled, Bed at 21 with 8 episodes and an hour duration for an episode.
Since Nadine was barred from watching rated movies, she stayed off. She even preferred watching cartoons and animations. She said there were fun and stress-free. She isn’t a fan of books and novels as well, but she’s a die hard fan of music especially sad and emotional ones.
“Yeah. The director you’re working with now on your new project? What’s his name again. I think Jerry?” Mr. West asked, throwing a huge meat ball into his mouth.
“No, Garry” Mrs. West smirked.
“Oh…Garry! So, what’s with him? Any problem?” He asked.
“His daughter. His daughter is gay. She’s a fûcking lesbian”
Nadine raised her head instantly.
“You’ve got to be kidding me” Her father shook his head in disbelief.
“And you know what? When others were tattling about it, she didn’t care. She even said it proudly that she was gay and she was dating some female footballer. She has the temerity. Gosh, If I were her, I would have stuck my head into some wide open hole on the ground bawling my eyes out”
“I agree. Why would you fall in love with the same sêx. It makes no sense. So, did Garry approve of it?” Mr. West asked.
“He did, and in a proud manner. Stupid” Mrs. West spat.
Nadine watched her parents, and she could feel her head already twirling. Her rage was rising. She clenched her fist tightly around the fork she was holding.
Her parents jerked and turned to her when they heard a loud sound. Nadine had angrily dropped the fork on the table.
“Nadine, what’s with that face? Are…are you okay?” Mrs. West asked.
“What if it isn’t her fault?” Nadine whispered.
“Her fault? Whose? Bear, what are you talking about?”
Nadine rolled her eyes.
“I just lost appetite” She said and got up.
“Nadine?” Her father called.
“Later dad. Later. Besides, I’m not done with my assignments” She forced a smile and left.
“What’s with her?” Mrs. West asked out of concern.
“I wish I knew. Maybe she just needs rest. Perhaps those assignments has been taking a toll on her”
Nadine quickly opened the door and entered her room. She locked it fast and sat on the floor.
“Gosh” She whispered, feeling hot tears rushing down her eyes.
“You need to stop, Nadine. You aren’t gay” She shook her head. “Stop!” She screamed, praying her parents wouldn’t hear.
She went to her bed and grabbed her phone. She quickly went online and searched for handsome guys in the world.
She couldn’t even feel anything after seeing them. It was as if she was looking at a little mannequin.
“I hope this doesn’t work” She shook her head and went into Facebook.
She searched for Vera’s username and when she saw the Vera she was searching for, she clicked on her profile and went to her photos. As she looked through them, she felt her chest thumping.
“No, please no” She shook her head, and squeezed her chest.
“I need to stop” She muttered and threw her phone on the bed.
Nadine went to her drawer and opened it. She saw a roll of thread and a long sharp in. She swallowed hard and slowly took the needle. She closed the drawer and sat on the bed.
“I have no choice” She whispered and brought the needle closer to her skirt.
She took it upwards, exposing her sleek fair thighs. She closed her eyes tightly and penetrated the sharp head into her skin.
“Owww” She sobbed, closing her eyes tightly and forcing it in the more.
That was her first of self harming. It was never Nadine’s last, unfortunately…