just as i was standing infront of the bank and crying like someone who lost his d!ck, my fone rang. I looked at the screen and it was a friend named segun. I do call him “sege the guru” because is into blogging and ICT. SEGE: ogbeni how far? U number no dey waka since yesterday Me: sege how far SEGE: I dey o. Wetin do ur voice, u no dey sound normal my guy, u dey sound like life fowl wey dey inside hot water. wetin do u? ME: I have been duped by a woman i love so much. SEGE: say wetin, abeg pick a bike dey come Egbe right now. I stoppd a bike going to Egbe where segun lives. After 8mins. I am at segun’s room entrance Me: ko ko ko sege: who be that, come in.
I entered, sat down, then without wasting time, I summarized the whole episode to sege in 3minutes. SEGE: “were ni e o” omo porta ti lo agbari fun e… Ode ni e ME: no be my fault, this babe fine die and get assets for front and back. I just so much love her SEGE: Ogbeni, you are the “baddest maga ever liveth” me: thank u. Wetin i go come do now segun SEGE: no worry, we go arrange collect part or the whole of that 10k from her, u go still straff her free for the next 2days and u go discharge her without giving a kobo Me: is that possible, how i go do am now? Just immediately, a message came in from adebimpe which says “baby, i’m on my way back”. I showed it to sege. He laughed and said to me. “ogbeni, if u fall again this time, then u don break world maga record”. He opened a bulk sms application on his phone, draft an Access bank debit alert of 25k and send it to my line. Me: what should i do with it SEGE: Show it to her wen u reach house, tell her say ATM debit the whole 25k wey u wan give her and the money no come out of the machine, so u dey go the bank tomorrow to complain. But if she no fit wait, tell her say u get person wey u fit collect the money from and then call me make i show.
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We go dey write d script on whatsapp as u dey go. But make sure u clear the whatsapp chats after ooo I dashed out of segun’s house. I went home straight, on getting home, i met adebimpe sitting on the bed restless. As i entered, she hugged me and gave me a kiss. BIMPE: baby, u look unhappy, what happend? Me: ** i brought out my fone and showed her the alert and then act the drama as directed by segun”*** bimpe wore a sad face BIMPE: What do we do now? This is 11:08am and i must get to PHC today. ME: ok relax, let me call a friend to borrow me 20k to give you, i will sort him when u are gone. I picked up my phone and called segun to come. Bimpe hugged and kissed me again and said “u are a darling”. I asked of the surprise she promised earlier, she said i should wait till my friend leaves so that no one will disturb. I replied “ok”. Segun arrived at about 10mins later. ME: sege my guy. Pls i need ur help, my babe wan return to school today and ATM fu-Cked up. Abeg borrow me 20k till tomorrow. SEGUN: lai lai.
The 8k wey u borrow last time, u neva returm am and u wan collect another one?. I go give u the 20k only after u refund the previous 8k. ME: Se na because of 8k u come dey disgrace me infront of my babe?. Abeg i go give u the two together. SEGUN: lai lai, find means and give me the 8k first. Then i turned to bimpe. Me: bimpe, pls do u have 8k with you, let me give this guy so that he can give me the 20k BIMPE: i dont have that amount, the only money on me is 5,500 and its a money that my friend gave me to buy weavon for her from lagos. ME: Don’t worry, give me 5k out of it, since am giving you 20k in return, u can then sort your friend. She gave me the 5k and i gave it to segun. ME: Now wey i don give u 5k out of 8k, can u now help me? SEGUN: Se u know say u be akue?. If not because of ur pretty girlfriend, i no go help u. Let me go home and bring the money, I will be back in 10mins time. Immediately after segun’s departure, she gave me the surprise. We had a hot romance which led to one round of sweet segz.
3mins after that, segun called, i picked and put on loud speaker. Me: sege how far?, where is the money now? SEGUN: wahala don shele oo. As i dey come ur place the other time, i forget to lock my door, before I reach home, dem don carry my lappy and took all the 30k wey dey house. ME: Eyah. So sorry oo. Abeg se u fit return that 5k, i go find means add to it give my babe? SEGUN: U dey mad ni. **segun hung up the call. ** ***********flash back******** * Immediately after segun’s departure, bimpe looked into my eyes while she sat on the bed…she said…..