My Husband and I
Dark Romance ?
Part 3
Episode 45
~ Mary’s POV ~
“Gbenga,” I said once more staring at the grey-haired man in the eye as he stood before me.
“In the flesh, Mary,” he attempted to jest despite the tense air between us. Albeit shaky, he smiled at me heartwarmingly. “How’ve you been?”
Although the question he asked was simple, I can’t tell how I felt. He’s asking about my well-being after all this time. It’s been months since we’ve spoken and he chooses to show up out of the blue. Why? Why would he appear after all this time? My brain spewed a barrage of questions that I desperately needed an answer to. The biggest one of all concerned whether he arrived with John or not.
“Is he with you?” I asked, brushing over his question.
My eyes darted around, trying to spot him, but he was nowhere to be seen. As far as I can tell.
Gbenga cleared his throat awkwardly. “It’s just me, Mary.” Seeing the distrust on my face, he smiled and faltered.
“I promise.”
“Ok,” I breathed out. “What are you doing here?”
Through the years of knowing Gbenga, he’s always been kind to me. I loved him for that, but his relationship with John was bigger than ours. And I had the misfortune of understanding just how their friendship was. Gbenga couldn’t be trusted because he remained loyal to my husband.
So for now, it was best to disregard formalities and get down to the real reason he was here.
“I wanted to talk to you. I’ve tried calling but…”
“I don’t have my old phone anymore. I don’t have anything that once belonged to me which I’m sure you can tell if you’ve talked to my husband.”
God, I was somewhat proud of myself for sounding headstrong. My nerves were frazzled as anxiousness began to form in the pit of my stomach. This interaction has barely started, but I was ready for it to be over.
“Johnson hasn’t been so forthcoming with information. He mentioned that you left and that was all. He won’t speak more on it which I can understand as it’s not my business, but..”
Left? Did John tell him I chose to leave?
“Wait,” I stopped him mid-sentence. “He told you l left home willingly?”
He stammered for a moment, confusion leaked in his gaze.
“Yes. Which is why I’ve….”
“He lied to you,” I told him. Next to the boiling anxiety, anger slowly started to sleep in. “He threw me out to rot.”
At my words, Gbenga’s face paled. “What? He wouldn’t do that, Mary.
Johnson loves you…”
I scoffed, wanting to rebuttal. The old man rose to defend John. “He does, Mary. His behavior has been off lately. He misses you. He can be a goddamn fool sometimes but he wouldn’t.”
“Well, he did, sir. End of story. There’s no way he misses me when he hasn’t bothered to show up himself or make sure I was alright.” I said, before continuing.
“Thanks for stopping by, but I don’t want to discuss this anymore.”
Straightening my shoulders, I stepped on him to walk away. For a brief moment, I saw Shola waiting by the car. He stood there with his arms crossed across his chest, watching over me. Although he looked relaxed, leaning on his car, I could see he looked ready to intervene. Seeing him brought me some comfort.
Knowing at any time, he might come to my rescue. I saw Shola until Gbenga stepped in front of me and blocked my view, effectively blocking my path, causing me to let out a small sigh of irritation.
“Gbenga, I have somewhere to be…”
“He’s been drinking.” He said as if his words would instantly stop me.
“He always drinks. When have you not seen him with a beer in his hand?” I asked him.
Moving another step which he instantly followed.
“No Mary.” He was no longer smiling, his tone turned serious.
Placing a hand on my shoulder to stop me from walking again, his eyes met mine.
“He’s drinking. It’s getting worse.”
Although his words had my brows raising, I didn’t feel too much concern. Almost as if I didn’t care. Why should I? My husband threw me out without flinching and left me with absolutely nothing. He treated me like nothing. Maybe seeing his accomplice triggered me, but I feel so angry right now.
I was happy before he showed up. I may have pondered on my marriage during the last few months, but I was happy.
Now, here he comes ruining that little peace I’ve had. He dares to show up at my job. To talk of a man who no longer loves me, yet he claims he does.
“What does that have to do with me?” I voiced my thoughts aloud.
Trying to remain calm and stoic even though my heart was beating erratically. This was too much. The past few weeks, I’ve done my best to keep my mind off of John. Wanting to try to possibly become stronger. But how could I do that if.. No! I won’t let him ruin this for me. I shouldn’t.
“You’re his wife. Everything concerns you. He stared at me as if I had grown two heads.
“What’s gotten into you, Mary?”
“Is there a problem here, officer?” a voice approached beside us.
Too stuck in the conversation, I hadn’t noticed Shola had appeared. Although I had originally told him to stay back, I couldn’t help but be grateful he interrupted.
Turning his attention from me, Gbenga looked at Shola. More like, looked up at him since Shola was a tall man.
“No problem at all. I’m just talking to a friend. You can keep walking my friend,” Gbenga informed him.
“It doesn’t seem like a friendly conversation to me,” Shola’s eyes pointedly darted to the hand on my shoulder.
Seeing where his gaze went, Gbenga removed his hand before clearing his throat.
“It is, my friend…,” he trailed off, wanting a name from Shola who just smiled charmingly and shrugged.
“No name, I’m just a good Samaritan.”
Gbenga nodded, but I could tell it irritated him.
“Well,” he began, seeing that Shola still hadn’t left. “As I said, you can continue on your way.”
Gesturing down the path, he turned back to me, brushing Shola off. As if he would just walk away. I knew I should probably interrupt, but I wasn’t sure what to say.
“I will, once I’m sure that she’s okay. Until then, I’ll be staying.” Sholai insisted.
Gbenga sighed exhaustedly, facing him again. This time with a scowl on his face while Shola’s expression remained the same. Grinning as he became an inconvenience to Gbenga, his eyes spoke volumes to me. He was serious despite the Ç0çƙy confidence he was exhibiting. He kept his focus on Gbenga and each movement he made, calculating him.
“As you can see, I’m an officer, who…?
“And I’m in the military, but you don’t see me flashing my uniform everywhere I go. Clearly, the woman you’re speaking to is uncomfortable. I mean if she’s getting arrested I’ll leave,” Shola shrugged nonchalantly, except he was anything but.
“However, if you aren’t, I’d like your badge number.”
“Excuse me…”
“You’re excused, officer. If there’s no reason for you to be here.” He deadpanned.
I couldn’t help but watch the exchange between the two men. Gbenga was flabbergasted, and his pale skin was beginning to redden. Not only was he upset, but apparently he was embarrassed. He glanced at me as if prompting me to say something. When I refused to speak, he ran a hand over his face with a sigh. Afterward, he shook his head before he walked away silently.
As soon as he left, my shoulders slouched in defeat. I felt drained.
“Are you ok?” Shola asked, watching Gbenga get into his squad car and pull off.
Once the car rounded the corner, he focused his attention on me. His eyes scanned me over as he awaited an answer.
“Not really,” I confessed, still stuck on what had happened.
“Thank you, I’m sorry you had to get involved, but I’m grateful that you did.”
“No apology necessary. He was bothering you and I couldn’t stand back and watch. Come on, let’s get out of here.” He said, and I nodded silently.
Motioning for me to walk with him, we made our way to his car. He opened the door for me and I got in. Closing the door behind me, he rounded the car and got in the driver’s seat. Shola made sure our seatbelts were on before he began driving us to the apartment. I stared out at the scenery before me, lost in my thoughts.
***
Walking into the room, I sat down on the bed, leaning down to take my heels off. With a heavy heart, I tried not to think of what happened with Gbenga. What he told me, but his words were on a loop in my mind. John has always had a drinking problem, but he had gotten better after I thought sometimes. At least, that’s what I thought.
Now he’s drowning himself in liquor and I…. No, no, I shouldn’t care. I won’t care. He did this to himself. It’s not my fault. It’s not my fault, I repeated until my shoulders began to quake as I sobbed into the palm of my hand.
Why is this happening to me? Why would I still feel responsible? I’m trying to be strong, yet I’m crying like a fool. John has wronged me over and over again, and each time I’ve forgiven him. This time, I don’t want to, but I shouldn’t care, but I do. I want to remain indifferent and move on.
He doesn’t love me. So why am I crying over him? Why do I feel guilty for trying to become more than just his wife? This is his fault! Not mine! Not mine!
Picking up the broken dish, my finger snagged onto a shard of glass. Hissing in pain, my tears cascaded down my face. Paying it no mind as I continued on my knees to clean up the mess.
~ Flashback ~
“It’s all your fault, Mary. His voice boomed.
“I’m sorry, John, I thought you would like it. I can make you something else to eat.”
He grumbled under his breath, “Just order something. How don’t you know how to cook? Didn’t you have to feed yourself in foster care? What made you think I wanted that?”
“I…I..,”
“Nevermind, I’ll go out to eat,” he gathered his coat from the chair. Mumbling under his breath as he went past me.
“Can’t do a d@mn thing by yourself.” Walking out of the dining room, he collected his keys. It wasn’t a moment later, the door slammed, making me flinch. My river of tears wasn’t doing me much good. Accidentally cut me on another piece of the broken glass he’d thrown earlier, they blurred my vision.
I drove him away. I did this. I have to do better; I scolded myself collecting the food that had spilled on the floor into the trash. He won’t want me if I can’t make a good meal. It’s my fault, I have to do better. I have to.
“Mary?” I looked up, my eyes connecting to Abbey who stood in the door of the apartment.
Bringing me back to the present as I cried, concern burning bright in his gaze as he came toward me in a rush. I tried to wipe away my tears as quickly but there was no point. Sitting beside me, he scooped my body into his arms, sitting me in his lap.
“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing, I…” sniffing as I tried to stop crying. I did my best to put on a smile. I wondered how long he had been standing there.
“I’m fine. Just a long day.”
“Don’t give me that,” he shook his head. “Talk to me, please, so I can fix it.”
God, he was the sweetest man on earth. I should be enjoying my time with him instead of being distraught over John. He doesn’t deserve my tears or my heart. I knew that.
Maybe if ignore it, it’ll go away and I won’t feel this way. I won’t have to worry about what’s going on in the home. I mean I..I hit him but he…he…
I had to calm down. Crying this much would do me no good. Besides, I didn’t want to scare Abbey away. I had to stop being weak and downright stupid. I had to be better. Or he won’t want me.
“You can’t. Please, I’m okay. I just need to clear my head, is all.” I told him.
Abbey has been great about everything, and I don’t want to keep unloading my crap on him. It wouldn’t be right or fair to him. Besides, there really isn’t anything he can do. And I don’t want him to get tired of me.
Thought of returning to my husband enveloped in me. I was married. I’m still married. Confused that John misses me.
Should I go back to Johnson?
To be continued…
Frank The Writer